Jesus is in Tunisia

Jesus, you have gone before me and set my feet on solid ground. You have prepared a Way for me. I chose to look to Your face for anytime I am in trouble. I love You Lord. All the days of my life I will proclaim Your love. May Your light shine from my face. Show me Your Glory!

Outreach is hard. I'm not going to sugar coat anything. It is hard! I miss my friends & family. I miss Jax! I am getting annoyed with people. I feel like I am being challenged by students on decisions Misty and I make. Language barriers are overwhelming. Men look at American women like a piece of meat, that are loose. I feel violated and disrespected every time I go out without one of our guys. The Muslim women are so oppressed. I'm tired and weak. I want a cheeseburger. I want bacon! I want my mom.... Sometimes I want to give up and call it quits.  

Then I remember one thing. Jesus loves me. He loves me. He loved me when I was away from Him. He loved me when I rejected Him. He loved me and was with me when I ran as far as I could from Him. He reminded me tonight that even though I may be struggling with stepping out and speaking to people, even though there seems to be no hope for these people He told me to look at myself a few years ago. He said "Ansley, don't you remember how hopeless you felt? Don't you know that, that same hopelessness you felt then, is what these people feel now?! Show them what you found. Show them how much I love them. Show them. Let them experience the freedom I have brought YOU!" . 

I realized today that it's not all about me. It's not about how I feel, or what I should do. It's just about how God wants to use me. I need to be so sensitive to His voice and listening constantly for what He wants to do in people's lives. He has already brought me to this beautiful place but now I need to do my part. I need to TRUST Him! I need to believe that God is going to use and move through me. I need to show people the love and freedom I have found in my Jesus. He is so beautiful and captivating.

I do what I do so I can share the love of Christ to people. Not the love of Ansley! I am only a vessel for God to use me. So when I feel like I am useless then I need to stand up and respond in the opposite spirit. I am not useless. I am able. God is my strength. That is when freedom reigns. THAT IS WHEN LIVES ARE CHANGED FOREVER! God is here and moving in Tunisia. He is stirring people's hearts. Please pray that God gives them dreams and visions of Him. That is the biggest way Muslims encounter Jesus for the first time. That opens HUGE doors for us. 

Guys, I am sorry for this being a soap box sometimes but this helps gets my feelings out. Writing it out helps me to rediscover what I did today and think and process through it. I hope you all enjoy the blogs. I will do them as often as I can. Don't forget to signup for them because that will help you keep up better if you want to. 

Don't forget that Jesus loves you too! He is in the States as much as He is over here. Keep praying for the team and I. I love y'all like crazy!!!!
~Ans~

P.s. here is a picture of Misty and I over Malaga, Spain!  :)

When you wish upon a star...

I have always been told that if you put your mind to it, you can make your dreams come true. Well for me, it wasn't me who made my dreams come true. Now I know what you are thinking... Oh, God made them come true. But let me tell you something. HE DID! Not in the way I thought or even the dreams I had made myself. It was far greater than just having the white picket fence and 2.5 kids. It was more than having a great husband. It was more than being the all American mom. All of these things are good, don't get me wrong. But for me, that did not satisfy me. I needed more of Jesus, because I saw what He was doing in my life and I didn't want to miss the opportunity of something bigger for me. What I saw when I looked at Him, was a man who had so much to offer me if I took it. He was handing me a life full of traveling, loving, and children. For me that was the more appealing choice. I think I have always been a big dreamer, maybe not on the outside but I always wanted the wildest and far fetched things.

Since being on my own and living in Florida I have realized who I am. I saw that I was a bold, beautiful, free, redeemed, and strong woman. I found myself finally after searching for at least 5 years. I will never go back to my mediocre way of life. I want more of Jesus. I want more of His life. I want to love people to the very core of who God created them to be and call that out in them. I want to change the world with the love I found. 

So back to my dreams. When I was in 5th grade I remember reading a book in Mr. Field's history class. It was about a girl in Kenya, Africa who lived in a village. That's all I remember. I wish I could remember more but my memory fails me. Anyway so after reading this book I knew in that moment that I wanted to go there. I didn't know how, when, where, or why but I wanted to go there. And for some odd reason I felt like the Lord spoke to me and said "One day you will." WHOA! I knew from then on I wanted to travel and see all kinds of culture. Ever since then I had this passion growing inside of me to go to this place I had only read about. For some time I kept it hidden because I thought people would laugh. So for most of my life I didn't let people know I loved Africa because no one else was talking about how they wanted to travel. They all wanted homes, and families. I wanted that but I really wanted to travel more than I did those things at that time. (Now I want all those things). Every time I saw a black person, heard African music, heard Africa, saw animals from there, my heart leaped with joy because I had grown a love for a place I had never once stepped foot on. 

I have not forgotten that promise. I still have that same excitement I did as a child. It had not hit me until about a month ago that I was actually going to Africa. I AM GOING TO AFRICA!!!!!! When I realized this for the first time I was filled with so much JOY! The joy of the Lord had captured me and spun me around and said... 'Here you go. Just like I promised." JUST LIKE HE PROMISED!  God is faithful. He is faithful. I realize that more and more as the day get closer. When I step out onto the ground of Africa, I will shout with love and joy about my God. After all these years of waiting I finally get to see what my  heart so longs to be a part of. My God is bigger than I could dream about. He has made my dreams come true. Looking back I see how all the things I went through and had to face are helping me in this very moment right now. I am leading a team. I am strong and free. I am redeemed. I am blessed. 

I can not believe I get to see the promise I have been waiting for. I am so amazed at how God works things together for my good. He is a good Father. So, for now I shall talk to you all later. Please continue to be lifting the team up in your prayers. 

Love you like crazy,
~Ans~

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